Before you have your first baby, everyone you know who already has kids tells you over and over (with wicked satisfaction) how hard it’s going to be, how drastically your life will change, and how many of the things you used to love to do will no longer be possible because you won’t have the time or energy to do them. I thought that their warnings had sunk in and that my eyes were wide open, but now that Jasper is eight months old and Jake and I are in the thick of it… Damn, they weren’t kidding. The “scarcities” side of this blog has taken on a new meaning. Many things are scarce now – like sleep – and it became clear early on that although music feeds the soul, it does not feed the baby.
So how to find balance? When I used to neglect the art side of my life it was just because I was being lazy or was uninspired. Now I’m faced with real challenges. I want to practice; I want to create; I want to record; I want to perform, but there is no way to carve out significant chunks of time to do this. So here’s my solution: Use any time that I can to do any thing that even slightly resembles a creative act. I sing for Jasper while I’m preparing his meals or doing dishes or lulling him to sleep. Jake and I got him his own little piano so we can play together, even if it’s just for the few moments that his attention holds. We try to practice (quietly) during naps or after he’s gone to bed for the night, even if it’s only a couple of songs. We try to entertain him by playing music for him, but he’s not fond of our diminished chords – a little too scary.
But the best way to get motivated and make time is to have a looming deadline. Next gig is Memorial Day weekend. Time to start rebuilding those calluses.
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